Functioning Discipleship
In this report we will
unfold the details of a functioning discipleship relationship. There are four
major areas in this relationship that we will use to define the term,
discipleship relationship also called a discipling relationship; trust,
teaching, friendship in partnership and impressing the legacy of love. Jesus
tells us that He is the Way and that the only way to the Father is through Him
but Jesus did not leave us with a mold or methodology as to how to get there.
In fact, we see Jesus use a number of ways to extend the invitation of the good
news and each of them welcome the individual to pick up their own mat and walk.
When training one another in Christ we must allow each other the freedom to
come to Jesus on our own two feet.
The example relationship we will examine is between this
writer and my friend Troy. Our relationship began under strange circumstances
but over time developed into a mutually beneficial partnership. Troy was our
campus ministry leader in Albuquerque and we were introduced by title before
names were given, as I served as a campus minister for a number of years
before. When followers of Christ become professional Christians we follow suit
and treat each other accordingly. This is still a very cordial and friendly, if
not politically correct, approach but it is not family.
Building trust takes quality time and no title given to
an individual can replace the value of time spent together. When asking Troy
whether or not it was easy to understand my perspective on the Bible and the
Christian life or whether it took time to understand, Troy responded that the
understanding was there immediately as there was nothing new being said but the
life takes time to accept. This is wise because so many are willing to try
anything for what they perceive to be success but an examination of the
individual’s life may not back up their teaching. This is truly the heart of a
Berean and one that is sought after by our Father in Heaven as my titles or
achievements meant very little but life and doctrine would continue to be the
dividing line.
This was the beginning of trust for Troy and I. Trust is
of course either strengthened or weakened by the fruit we produce. Fortunately
for the follower of Christ we have no original material and the lifestyle is a
result of who we follow and He has been faithful since the beginning. Troy
commented that because there was fruit behind the teaching it was easy to
understand and put into practice. It should be noted that no one can take
credit for the fruit that only God can deliver. Serving Troy in this way is one
of the joys and indeed responsibilities of following Jesus.
Once we begin taking credit for the accomplishments of
others we have missed the mark in a dangerous manner. To this writer’s
understanding it is much like a wrench taking credit for the overhaul of a
transmission. Not only does it take many tools to get the job done it takes a
mechanic to put the tools to use. This is not to say there is no pleasure for
the individual in a discipling relationship but it is to say that the idea of
self will be far removed from that pleasure. Serving the gospel, whether in
evangelism or discipleship is a striving for a glory that is not our own.
Teaching is most effective with trust in place. It is
necessary to teach and instruct each other and so again we come back to the
example of Jesus.
“My
command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no
one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my
friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because
a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you
friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you”
(John 15:12-15, NIV).
Our teaching comes from the Father as it did to the Son and
we share in this teaching as we give it to others. We have been commanded to
love and in this we are able to participate in an amazing aspect of the divine
nature called friendship. Having asked Troy what he recalls about any teaching
from our encounters, he used a term we are both trying to get away from but
cannot: organic.
Encouragement
overtook my heart at hearing it and perhaps this is a sample of the pleasure an
individual may experience in a discipling relationship. The idea of a robotic
faith or a rinse and repeat approach did not sit well with Troy. Prepackaged
evangelism is just a small step away from prepackaged discipleship and
eventually Christianity.
“In
some cases the method of witnessing we’re asked to use causes our
evangelophobia. If it requires approaching someone we’ve never met before and
striking up a conversation about Christ, most people will be terrified and
indicate it by their absence” (Whitney 1992, 96) .[1]
This is not to say there were not solid teachings and
foundational truths offered to Troy in a prepackaged approach but we all must
grow out of our mold. On to maturity as it is commonly phrased. This was my
approach to teaching my friend Troy. Show him the tools given to us as His
children and then let him play with them.
Troy grew in
ways that still encourage my soul today. This is the power of discipling
relationships in that we can remove stumbling blocks for each other and then
share in the joy of moving past them. Witnessing Troy develop as a man of God
was empowering and completely fulfilling. It was at this time my mind was
finally awakened to the fact that Troy is now my friend through trust, my
fellow brother in following our Lord and my partner in the gospel by grace.
Troy earned the trust of his ministry as he released control and became a
friend to them as well. Troy still taught from the Bible but control was given
to God and his ministry responded by becoming partners in the gospel.
One vital
shift that became evident to those around Troy was the growth of his entrusted
ministry. Naturally the initial excitement was found in the number of souls
that God was adding to His church. Something else was at work in the hearts of
those believers that were in the campus ministry as well. Confidence, security
and joy were evident in these men and women. Everyone had a place and felt a
part of the family and this was the new radical message of love being passed
along. Of course there is nothing new about the message of love but anyone who
has ever experienced the blessing of its teaching will tell you it feels new
every time.
Finally Troy
was asked to share what he learned from our encounters together. Troy, now a
father with children running around him, said in short that there was a
different way to do things. We can love this world without a script and we can
trust that God is faithful. People can change because they want to and not
because they are told to. Love is the long term solution. This is more than
could be hoped for because if there was any one point I would want to give, it
would be that love never fails.
It was in response to my next question that
led me to marvel at the power of God and the joy or serving Him in this
capacity. What is your approach to discipling relationships? What are you
attempting to impress upon others in Christ? Troy said, “Neighbor is a global
term not a local term, how we live matters.” This is one of many convictions
that have developed in the maturing process of this man of God. A genuine
discipling relationship affords both the privilege of sharing in our victories
as well as defeats. In summary trust must be built and not manufactured, training
must be rooted in the teaching of Jesus, friendship must become partnership and
the legacy of love must be impressed to the next generation. When training one
another in Christ we must allow each other the freedom to come to Jesus on our
own two feet.
[1]
Whitney, Donald S. Spiritual Disciplines For The Christian Life.
Colorado Springs: NavPress, 1992.
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